A long time friend of mine sent me a message on Facebook asking me not to "hijack" her threads. She's politically left of me and hardly ever posts anything but liberal politics. So mostly I just ignore them, but occasionally I comment. I've never heard of a thread belonging to anyone before. She had some obscure criteria but it feels more like she just doesn't want anyone to ever disagree with her. Do threads "belong" to people? Does anyone have a right to censor others, as long as the comments are respectful and courteous?

I think of threads like a conversation, and like many conversations, they often wander far afield from the starting point. some people think of them more as debates, and as such they should be kept to the topic. sounds like your friend thinks of them as lectures, with lots of notetaking and few questions.

In my opinion, threads don't belong to people; they belong to topics. So in your scenario, I don't think it inappropriate for you to post a differing view than the prevailing opinion on the thread. If the thread were about Obamacare or something, I think it's fine for you to post your criticism of it (and I say this as someone who generally is on the liberal side of things). Now, if, in our hypothetical Obamacare thread, you post about bicycles or jelly beans or the new Superman movie, then I would consider that a hijack.

Sounds like she just doesn't want to interact with you on Facebook. There are easier ways for her to deal with that, but she may not be very savvy with it.

I have never been on Facebook, so this post is steeped in ignorance.

But based on my limited, weak perception of what Facebook is (where people have their own pages, and boards to post on, where information is personal, and (per my perception) controlled to some degree by the 'owner' of the page or board or whatever), and is not, I would think that it is not meant to be used in the same manner as a public message board (such as the Parliament).

Or at least the owner of each 'page' or whatever, would have some say in how their 'page' is used. And if they didn't want to host a mini-Parliament message board, that would be their prerogative.

If my ignorance puts me off base here, I'm certainly willing to learn more about the ins and outs of Facebook . . . . from a safe distance LOL.

At casual first blush, their request for you to observe their 'unwritten rules' for their 'page' may be their sincere attempt to change what you're doing without blocking you from accessing the page to begin with (as an alternative).

(05-26-2013 06:00 PM)Rick Gerlach Wrote:  I have never been on Facebook, so this post is steeped in ignorance.

But based on my limited, weak perception of what Facebook is (where people have their own pages, and boards to post on, where information is personal, and (per my perception) controlled to some degree by the 'owner' of the page or board or whatever), and is not, I would think that it is not meant to be used in the same manner as a public message board (such as the Parliament).

Or at least the owner of each 'page' or whatever, would have some say in how their 'page' is used. And if they didn't want to host a mini-Parliament message board, that would be their prerogative.

If my ignorance puts me off base here, I'm certainly willing to learn more about the ins and outs of Facebook . . . . from a safe distance LOL.

At casual first blush, their request for you to observe their 'unwritten rules' for their 'page' may be their sincere attempt to change what you're doing without blocking you from accessing the page to begin with (as an alternative).

Responding to FB friends you do not go on "their page" per se. In fact what happens is their posts show up on your Home Page. There's no way to escape seeing them. Thus the need to ignore stuff you don't agree with, or respond in some way. I was thinking of sending her a PM saying I don't mean it to end our relationship (Not that we have one outside of [her] politics. I knew this girl in high school - over 40 years ago. Have not seen her since.) I just would rather not have to deal with her posts, so I am "unfriending her". She could still message me. The constant hum drum of left-sided politics with no interlude for any personal notes from some of my friends on FB is ridiculous and nauseating.

That's pretty unreasonable IMHO on her part. Facebook lets you (or at least it used to, I can't keep up) post to subgroups of friends. If she only wants to discuss politics with like minded people, she should make a list of 'liberal friends' or something like that. You could also hide her posts if you don't want to unfriend her.

I follow a "no politics" rule on facebook. I've made a couple exceptions and have never, ever thought "gee, I'm glad I did that!" But maybe that's just because of what I use facebook for - keeping in touch with friends and relatives who live far away and setting up social meetups for my local friends/fellow parents...

I have some pretty far left friends on Facebook, and some of them post political comments all the time. I typically respond with a counter argument. My thought is that when you post something controversial, you should expect disagreement. If you're not prepared to deal with it, don't post in the first place.

(05-27-2013 07:14 AM)WeatherfordOwl Wrote:  I was thinking of sending her a PM saying I don't mean it to end our relationship (Not that we have one outside of [her] politics. I knew this girl in high school - over 40 years ago. Have not seen her since.) I just would rather not have to deal with her posts, so I am "unfriending her". She could still message me.

If you still want to officially be her "friend" but not see this, if you go to the upper right hand corner of her post (the end of the faint line above it), a down arrow should appear. Click that, and you can hide the post. From there, if you wish, there's a link where you can hide all her status updates or all her comments.

(05-27-2013 09:44 AM)owl7886 Wrote:  

(05-27-2013 07:14 AM)WeatherfordOwl Wrote:  I was thinking of sending her a PM saying I don't mean it to end our relationship (Not that we have one outside of [her] politics. I knew this girl in high school - over 40 years ago. Have not seen her since.) I just would rather not have to deal with her posts, so I am "unfriending her". She could still message me.

If you still want to officially be her "friend" but not see this, if you go to the upper right hand corner of her post (the end of the faint line above it), a down arrow should appear. Click that, and you can hide the post. From there, if you wish, there's a link where you can hide all her status updates or all her comments.

Ah...will try that...with several friends. Some folks seem to be pretty one dimensional.

The thread topic is yours, but there is a spot to "like" or "comment". The "owner" can delete comments from others (i think) but it is bad form to deny people their right to comment. As OO says, she seems to want to lecture. Well, she DOES get the first word on her home page. Now, if the comment is offensive or hurtful, even if not by the facebook rules, i.e. a sensitive personal issue, that is something else... but honestly, who would want friends who agree with everything you say all of the time?

Taking threads off-topic is an entirely different issue. If you are doing it intentionally, that is one thing. If you are merely reminded of something because of something someone said, that is something else. Conversations don't need to stay on a single topic... why should threads? People who haven't been involved for a while can come back and be confused, but the entire thought process is there for them to read if they want.

(05-27-2013 09:44 AM)owl7886 Wrote:  

(05-27-2013 07:14 AM)WeatherfordOwl Wrote:  I was thinking of sending her a PM saying I don't mean it to end our relationship (Not that we have one outside of [her] politics. I knew this girl in high school - over 40 years ago. Have not seen her since.) I just would rather not have to deal with her posts, so I am "unfriending her". She could still message me.

If you still want to officially be her "friend" but not see this, if you go to the upper right hand corner of her post (the end of the faint line above it), a down arrow should appear. Click that, and you can hide the post. From there, if you wish, there's a link where you can hide all her status updates or all her comments.

Sounds like it's time to "unfriend" to me.

(05-28-2013 08:46 PM)WeatherfordOwl Wrote:  

(05-27-2013 09:44 AM)owl7886 Wrote:  

(05-27-2013 07:14 AM)WeatherfordOwl Wrote:  I was thinking of sending her a PM saying I don't mean it to end our relationship (Not that we have one outside of [her] politics. I knew this girl in high school - over 40 years ago. Have not seen her since.) I just would rather not have to deal with her posts, so I am "unfriending her". She could still message me.

If you still want to officially be her "friend" but not see this, if you go to the upper right hand corner of her post (the end of the faint line above it), a down arrow should appear. Click that, and you can hide the post. From there, if you wish, there's a link where you can hide all her status updates or all her comments.

Ah...will try that...with several friends. Some folks seem to be pretty one dimensional.

Just thought I would give a status report. After hiding her posts, and those of another friend (my best man of all people...) it has been quite a refreshing change. I might do the same thing with some other friends who continually post political stuff, that I even agree with, as well as one other who posts about 19 times a day with some huge pictures out of some magazine or something showing some cool house or whatever. It just sort of all clogs my home page and the really meaningful posts go by so quickly I never even see them.