RE: 2012 ACC Preseason Wonderlic Test
Picking FSU to win the ACC is similar to picking:
A) Dan Quayle as your Vice President
B) Frank Beamer to win a national championship
C) UGA to beat Steve Spurrier
D) Define insanity.
UNC has a new head coach, is banned from postseason play, has many key starters missing from last year, and was picked to finish in the Top 20, and finish no worse than second in the Coastal. Explain in 25 words or less.
Since when do the poll voters actually do research?
Dabo
A) Swinney
B) here for Leader Ford. When you buy a Ford ... buy from the Leader! Leader Ford in Seneca!
C) He say da- he say da- he say Daaaaaaabo. Dabo come and the D go home.
D) Georgia Tech's *****.
If Bob Davies is the announcer for the VT/GT game, when will you turn down the sound?:
A) First quarter
B) First commercial
C) Right after Erin Andrews interviews Snarky
D) Right after he says, GT is all about the option
E) Turn up the sound, I love Bob Davies
F) Are you referring to Bawb Dayvee?
G) Wes Durham eats him as a pre-game snack.
If NC State makes a horrendous mental error costing them a win, O'Brien is:
A) Contemplating what kind of fescue feels best under his feet.
B) Currently connected to the Matrix preloader, an endless room of white nothingness.
C) Slowly burying his 500 ib behemoth of a body beneath cheeto dust as he operates his surrogate.
D) Are you John Connor?
E) Making reservations in Boston to return.
Duke and a bowl game?
A) They have bowls in basketball?
B) You've been reading Dinich again haven't you?
C) Are they recruiting like Miami has been recently?
D) Derp
E) Tickets to the independence bowl to watch wake forest are pretty cheap.
Jim Grobe is to redshirts as Spaziani is to
A) Three and out
B) Kechley tackles
C) I'd like to lodge a formal protest that Chestnut Hill is not, has not been, and will never be Boston
D) petitioning the NCAA to allow Matt Ryan to come back for a sixth year, seventh too
There is a graph showing complaints of FSU and Clemson fans after expansion, versus times they have gone undefeated in conference play after expansion. The intersection of those two lines is:
A) Infinity ... because as we know from the preseason FSU wins it all every year
B) 42
C) The limit as x approaches 4 from the right of e^x
D) DNE
E) I was told there would be no math here.
What Syracuse and Pittsburgh will miss most about the Big East is
A) Scoring a chic and her parents at the same time in Morgantown
B) The 20,000 rabid commuter students in Tampa cheering for steak in front of a giant pirate ship
C) Road games in Boise, ID and San Diego, CA
D) Breaking up with Temple again ... or having a sordid triangle with the MAC
E) Not having to listen to auditory EPA SuperFund cleanup site that is Randy Edsall's mouth
F) Having a basketball-only school provide every conference commissioner in a major football conference.
Maryland's uniforms are designed by
A) Ray Charles
B) Under Armor
C) Hypotoad
D) Copying Randy Shannon's offensive plays as drawn on whiteboards
E) An artist who can only get the government to buy his crap.
Bobby Dodd stadium
A) Should have a NRA and GOA store for people walking back through Home Park
B) Is in a game of chicken to see how awful it can become architecturally before GT's own Architecture school cannot fix it
C) That one with the endzone right?
D) A 55,000 seat expansion of the Varsity on North Avenue on game day.
U
A) Mad?
B) fought the law and law won
C) as confused as I am with central Miami being associated with white collars and bad ties?
D) 3 academies, 1 college, 1 institute, and 119 U's. Which are you referring to?
Swofford should be punished for his transgressions by
A) Being forced to watch and listen to catdaddy "A Clockwork Orange" style
B) Make sweet sweet love to Cavman and be called Cavwoman
C) Watch the Boston College vs Maine game
D) Play QB for Duke
E) All of the above
F) E plus watching every game that UNC lost while they were cheating their butts off anyway.
BONUS #1:
Top rated recruiting classes are to National Championships, as Mark Richt is to:
1)UGA player arrests
2)Tanning booths
3)The Outback Bowl
4) Barking fans are to cleanliness on game day.
BONUS #2:
If Georgia loses a couple of games early again this year, will they be the best 2 loss team of all time?
No, but they'll be second to the 2007 UGA team that finished with two losses.
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