(02-15-2018 11:48 PM)OptimisticOwl Wrote:  

(02-15-2018 04:42 PM)RiceLad15 Wrote:  

(02-15-2018 04:10 PM)OptimisticOwl Wrote:  

(02-15-2018 11:57 AM)RiceLad15 Wrote:  

(02-15-2018 11:21 AM)OptimisticOwl Wrote:  are you married, Lad?

Lots of marriages have survived infidelity. most of those survived because the betrayed spouse never knew. mine survived for years - until I knew.

What's your point? How does my personal marital status matter to my opinion about how politicians act in the bed room?

As long as two adults are consenting, that act itself doesn't matter to me, and are not automatic disqualifies for someone to run for office. I fail to see how my marital status matters.

It was this:

"...being honest and open with one's spouse, etc."

It kind of smacks of a an inexperience in marital matters, like you think Trump should have told Melania, "Hey Hon, I'm going to have sex with a porn star tonight, don't wait up" and she would have answered "Fine darling, as long as you are honest and open about it". In other words, a bit idealistic.

Not that it doesn't happen. One of my cousins lives in a house with her husband AND her lover. However, that came about partially because her husband is a devout Catholic who will not divorce and also is a stubborn man who will not be run out of his house. But I bet she does not have his OK on the situation, even though she is honest and open about the matter. BTW, the most far left of my cousins, a LULAC member.

You should maybe reread what I said and digest it a bit more.

Quote: I do think there is something to be said for one's character in how they go about those things (as in, being honest and open with one's spouse, etc.) but it's nice that these consensual transgressions are not really killers of one's aspirations.

My point with that comment was that I can understand how someone could judge someone's character for those transgressions, especially if the partner did not disclose their affair (by the way, there is a large swath of possible situations between the rather ludicrous one you posited, and a rather more realistic one of confessing to your partner following an affair). But that it is not enough of a character flaw to totally disqualify someone from higher office. I basically do not think the simple act of lying with another person is a disqualifier, but that you can begin to build an opinion of one's character based on how they handled the transgression.

If we hold everybody to the strict fidelity plus no lying standard, we run a risk of a Washington populated only by Mike Pence. I agree, I would not hold somebody ineligible solely on that. Not enough saints to get the job done. What i would do is try to be as forgiving of one side as the other. I didn't care about Bill and Monica very much, until he committed perjury, even though it was the kind of situation that can lead to sexual harassment charges that today would result in an immediate resignation. I didn't care that Teddy philandered, until he killed somebody. Kind of expected all that, given their history and background. I heard Gennifer Flowers interviewed live on the radio. Powerful and/or rich men often act that way.

I also didn't care about Reagan's or Trump's divorces. I am divorced myself, and now have been single for 34 years, in a large variety of relationships, and maybe my experience(s) make me more tolerant of marital problems than the average person. If Trump cheated on Melania, that is between them. If the lady tried to tried to blackmail him, that is his problem. If he paid her to be quiet, I can understand that. it all seems to me to be a BFD.

I mean, we're pretty much on the same page here - so I'm not sure why I'm getting a lot of pushback. We both seem to agree that we wouldn't immediately disqualify someone over an affair because it isn't really our business. Perhaps you think I am disagreeing with you because you expect me to because you think I hate all things Trump?

I said in a recent post, the only reason this is scandal-worthy is because of how juicy of a story it is - it's straight out of a TV show.