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If realignment was the game Diplomacy
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Fighting Muskie Online
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If realignment was the game Diplomacy
For those who don't know, Diplomacy is a WWI strategy game that pits the 7 European powers against each other in a battle for the domination of the continent. If the Power Conferences were playing it would have gone something like this:

The PAC 10, Big 8, Big Ten, SWC, SEC, ACC, and Eastern Independents all sit down to play.

In the first turn the SEC pulls an obscure rule out of the instructions about divisional play and a CCG and invades neutral South Carolina and the SWC's Arkansas. They then start tossing handfuls of Monopoly money in the air.

The Big Ten in turn, invades Penn St and Notre Dame but somehow are unable to conquer neutral ND.

The PAC 12, who thinks they are smarter than all the other players and didn't actually read any of the rules tries to invade Colorado and Texas and fail at both. They decide to go smoke pot for the next several turns.

The ACC invades neutral Florida St despite the Noles not being a big basketball school because apparently football is important in this game.

The Eastern Independents, who weren't taking this game all too seriously suddenly realize that this crap is for real. They declare they are changing their name to the Big East. They grab some pieces from a Risk game they had in the closet and toss them on the board to make their forces look bigger and claim that they can invade and conquer Miami from the fleet in Boston College in one move despite being hundreds of miles away.

The SWC's response to losing Arkansas puts their glass ego on full display, but they stop shy of flipping the whole board over but they pout and plot a way to no longer have to play. A couple turns later they let the Big 8 roll into 3 of their best territories and then have to get their mom involved to take a 4th, Baylor. The Big 8 sees no value in Rice, SMU, Houston, or TCU and just disband those units. They change their name to the Big 12 and somehow their capital ends up in Dallas.

While everyone is distracted by the SWC meltdown the Big East slides another Risk piece onto the board on Notre Dame.

A few turns go by and the ACC realizes they they are weak but the Big East is weaker. They scheme to invade Miami, Boston College, and Syracuse but not being real good at this game they botch the orders and take Miami but somehow invade Virginia Tech instead of their other goals. A turn later they get their crap together and finally add Boston College to their seaboard empire.

The Big East freaks out. They grab a sharpie marker and draw Louisville, Cincinnati, and USF on the board and claim that those are legitimate territories. They casually swap out the plastic Risk piece for UConn with a piece that actually goes this game and toss in a couple more Risk pieces in the Midwest for good measure. They also mistakenly think they lost Temple and disband that unit.

The PAC 10 comes back from their pot break and tries to invade Colorado and this time goes after the whole Southern wing of the Big 12. The Colorado thing works out but the rest not so much. Seeing that the Big East got away with drawing new territories on the board, they grab their own sharpie and claim that Utah is in play.

Seeing that the Big 12 is vulnerable, they swipe Nebraska. The Big 12 starts arguing with itself and untimately the SEC rolls in to take Missouri and Texas A&M.

The Big East remembers that TCU is actually a legitimate territory that's unoccupied and announces it's intentions to move a fleet from USF across the Gulf to take it.

The Big 12 grabs up TCU before they actually can make those plans a reality and when they Big East protests the Big 12 grabs a fighter plane from Axis and Allies and claims that they can fly it from Iowa St to WVU. None of the other players seem to care about this unorthodox move so the Big 12 gets away with it.

The ACC goes for a northern land grab, siezing Pitt and Cuse for good measure.

In a complete frenzy the Big East frantically starts drawing even more territories onto the board in Sharpie. The other 6 tell the Big East can't play anymore and they slide all their Risk pieces off the board and decide to go play risk in another room.

The Big Ten then decides to drive East taking Rutgers and Maryland.

Surprised, the ACC declares that Louisville is in fact a legit territory in this game and it's theirs. They also toss a playing piece from Risk on ND since it worked so well for the last player who tried it.

All the players then sat for multiple turns waiting for the Big 12 to finally make a rebound move to bounce from their losses. It then became apparent that they were never going to try and now everyone left is conjuring plans to carve them up.
(This post was last modified: 07-06-2019 03:11 PM by Fighting Muskie.)
07-06-2019 01:36 PM
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scoscox Offline
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Post: #2
RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Lol, I like it. We in the Big East are having a lot of fun in our separate room.
07-06-2019 01:45 PM
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Hammersmith Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Diplomacy: Killing friendships faster than Overcooked since 1959.
07-06-2019 05:28 PM
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bill dazzle Online
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-06-2019 01:36 PM)Fighting Muskie Wrote:  For those who don't know, Diplomacy is a WWI strategy game that pits the 7 European powers against each other in a battle for the domination of the continent. If the Power Conferences were playing it would have gone something like this:

The PAC 10, Big 8, Big Ten, SWC, SEC, ACC, and Eastern Independents all sit down to play.

In the first turn the SEC pulls an obscure rule out of the instructions about divisional play and a CCG and invades neutral South Carolina and the SWC's Arkansas. They then start tossing handfuls of Monopoly money in the air.

The Big Ten in turn, invades Penn St and Notre Dame but somehow are unable to conquer neutral ND.

The PAC 12, who thinks they are smarter than all the other players and didn't actually read any of the rules tries to invade Colorado and Texas and fail at both. They decide to go smoke pot for the next several turns.

The ACC invades neutral Florida St despite the Noles not being a big basketball school because apparently football is important in this game.

The Eastern Independents, who weren't taking this game all too seriously suddenly realize that this crap is for real. They declare they are changing their name to the Big East. They grab some pieces from a Risk game they had in the closet and toss them on the board to make their forces look bigger and claim that they can invade and conquer Miami from the fleet in Boston College in one move despite being hundreds of miles away.

The SWC's response to losing Arkansas puts their glass ego on full display, but they stop shy of flipping the whole board over but they pout and plot a way to no longer have to play. A couple turns later they let the Big 8 roll into 3 of their best territories and then have to get their mom involved to take a 4th, Baylor. The Big 8 sees no value in Rice, SMU, Houston, or TCU and just disband those units. They change their name to the Big 12 and somehow their capital ends up in Dallas.

While everyone is distracted by the SWC meltdown the Big East slides another Risk piece onto the board on Notre Dame.

A few turns go by and the ACC realizes they they are weak but the Big East is weaker. They scheme to invade Miami, Boston College, and Syracuse but not being real good at this game they botch the orders and take Miami but somehow invade Virginia Tech instead of their other goals. A turn later they get their crap together and finally add Boston College to their seaboard empire.

The Big East freaks out. They grab a sharpie marker and draw Louisville, Cincinnati, and USF on the board and claim that those are legitimate territories. They casually swap out the plastic Risk piece for UConn with a piece that actually goes this game and toss in a couple more Risk pieces in the Midwest for good measure. They also mistakenly think they lost Temple and disband that unit.

The PAC 10 comes back from their pot break and tries to invade Colorado and this time goes after the whole Southern wing of the Big 12. The Colorado thing works out but the rest not so much. Seeing that the Big East got away with drawing new territories on the board, they grab their own sharpie and claim that Utah is in play.

Seeing that the Big 12 is vulnerable, they swipe Nebraska. The Big 12 starts arguing with itself and untimately the SEC rolls in to take Missouri and Texas A&M.

The Big East remembers that TCU is actually a legitimate territory that's unoccupied and announces it's intentions to move a fleet from USF across the Gulf to take it.

The Big 12 grabs up TCU before they actually can make those plans a reality and when they Big East protests the Big 12 grabs a fighter plane from Axis and Allies and claims that they can fly it from Iowa St to WVU. None of the other players seem to care about this unorthodox move so the Big 12 gets away with it.

The ACC goes for a northern land grab, siezing Pitt and Cuse for good measure.

In a complete frenzy the Big East frantically starts drawing even more territories onto the board in Sharpie. The other 6 tell the Big East can't play anymore and they slide all their Risk pieces off the board and decide to go play risk in another room.

The Big Ten then decides to drive East taking Rutgers and Maryland.

Surprised, the ACC declares that Louisville is in fact a legit territory in this game and it's theirs. They also toss a playing piece from Risk on ND since it worked so well for the last player who tried it.

All the players then sat for multiple turns waiting for the Big 12 to finally make a rebound move to bounce from their losses. It then became apparent that they were never going to try and now everyone left is conjuring plans to carve them up.



Well done, FMuskie. Clever and punchy. The only change I would make (and assuming you are going as far back as the 1970s) is to have it framed in the intro as Eastern Independents/Metro Conference.

Again, loved it.
07-06-2019 06:56 PM
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Attackcoog Online
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Lol. That was awesome!
07-07-2019 01:27 AM
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Cyniclone Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-06-2019 01:45 PM)scoscox Wrote:  Lol, I like it. We in the Big East are having a lot of fun in our separate room.

But a handful of players left THAT game when the host serves hamburgers on Friday during Lent
07-07-2019 10:37 AM
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RutgersMike Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
I still have my AH Diplomacy game!
07-07-2019 09:20 PM
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cubucks Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Great post, very fun to read.
07-07-2019 09:29 PM
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RutgersMike Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Now, which conferences at the start would be England, France, Germany, Austria-Hungary, Italy, Russia and Turkey?
07-07-2019 09:36 PM
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vandiver49 Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Love it! The random Risk pieces were a nice touch.
07-08-2019 03:47 PM
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JRsec Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Real Realignment is Diplomacy. An entertaining OP, but as an old line Diplomacy player there is no luck, just plotted moves, strategy, and a lot of back room talks with more or less implied NDA's and the comparing of notes.

That's exactly what goes on in Realignment. The only difference is that teams of attorneys handle most of it when it gets past the back door conversations, past the secret application, and the early note passing. Oh, just one more thing, there is always a network involved as well.
07-08-2019 03:53 PM
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Fighting Muskie Online
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-07-2019 10:37 AM)Cyniclone Wrote:  
(07-06-2019 01:45 PM)scoscox Wrote:  Lol, I like it. We in the Big East are having a lot of fun in our separate room.

But a handful of players left THAT game when the host serves hamburgers on Friday during Lent

Alternatively, it was likely time for Bingo to start.
07-08-2019 08:46 PM
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TexanMark Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-07-2019 09:20 PM)RutgersMike Wrote:  I still have my AH Diplomacy game!

Avalon Hill had some awesome board games.

Rail Baron was my favorite...great way to kill 3 to 6 hours.
07-08-2019 09:04 PM
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-08-2019 03:53 PM)JRsec Wrote:  Real Realignment is Diplomacy. An entertaining OP, but as an old line Diplomacy player there is no luck, just plotted moves, strategy, and a lot of back room talks with more or less implied NDA's and the comparing of notes.

That's exactly what goes on in Realignment. The only difference is that teams of attorneys handle most of it when it gets past the back door conversations, past the secret application, and the early note passing. Oh, just one more thing, there is always a network involved as well.

One big difference: in reallignment, the powerful schools have a choice in the matter. In Diplomacy, a territory is powerless about who takes it over.

Some schools are powerful enough to initiate a conference realignment all on their own, and the conferences fell in line. Miami in 2003. Texas A&M in 2011. UConn in 2019.

Other schools pick their conference despite a clearly superior opportunity elsewhere. Miami in 1992. Florida State in 1992. Texas in 2011 (when they decided to stay put).
07-09-2019 02:55 PM
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JRsec Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-09-2019 02:55 PM)Captain Bearcat Wrote:  
(07-08-2019 03:53 PM)JRsec Wrote:  Real Realignment is Diplomacy. An entertaining OP, but as an old line Diplomacy player there is no luck, just plotted moves, strategy, and a lot of back room talks with more or less implied NDA's and the comparing of notes.

That's exactly what goes on in Realignment. The only difference is that teams of attorneys handle most of it when it gets past the back door conversations, past the secret application, and the early note passing. Oh, just one more thing, there is always a network involved as well.

One big difference: in reallignment, the powerful schools have a choice in the matter. In Diplomacy, a territory is powerless about who takes it over.

Some schools are powerful enough to initiate a conference realignment all on their own, and the conferences fell in line. Miami in 2003. Texas A&M in 2011. UConn in 2019.

Other schools pick their conference despite a clearly superior opportunity elsewhere. Miami in 1992. Florida State in 1992. Texas in 2011 (when they decided to stay put).

What people forget is that in '92 the ACC made slightly more than the SEC and Bowden had been put off by the SEC on multiple occasions in the 80's. So I wouldn't say given the circumstances at the time that the SEC was "clearly" the superior choice. Now considering how little extra TV revenue the ACC has made in comparison to the SEC since '92 in retrospect it would have been the clearly superior move, but in '92 it was different.

Texas stayed in 2011 because they couldn't take the right schools with them and they may have been having some buyers remorse prior to inking the deal since they are so very used to calling the shots.
07-09-2019 03:16 PM
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Captain Bearcat Offline
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-09-2019 03:16 PM)JRsec Wrote:  
(07-09-2019 02:55 PM)Captain Bearcat Wrote:  
(07-08-2019 03:53 PM)JRsec Wrote:  Real Realignment is Diplomacy. An entertaining OP, but as an old line Diplomacy player there is no luck, just plotted moves, strategy, and a lot of back room talks with more or less implied NDA's and the comparing of notes.

That's exactly what goes on in Realignment. The only difference is that teams of attorneys handle most of it when it gets past the back door conversations, past the secret application, and the early note passing. Oh, just one more thing, there is always a network involved as well.

One big difference: in reallignment, the powerful schools have a choice in the matter. In Diplomacy, a territory is powerless about who takes it over.

Some schools are powerful enough to initiate a conference realignment all on their own, and the conferences fell in line. Miami in 2003. Texas A&M in 2011. UConn in 2019.

Other schools pick their conference despite a clearly superior opportunity elsewhere. Miami in 1992. Florida State in 1992. Texas in 2011 (when they decided to stay put).

What people forget is that in '92 the ACC made slightly more than the SEC and Bowden had been put off by the SEC on multiple occasions in the 80's. So I wouldn't say given the circumstances at the time that the SEC was "clearly" the superior choice. Now considering how little extra TV revenue the ACC has made in comparison to the SEC since '92 in retrospect it would have been the clearly superior move, but in '92 it was different.

Texas stayed in 2011 because they couldn't take the right schools with them and they may have been having some buyers remorse prior to inking the deal since they are so very used to calling the shots.

Perhaps.

But the original PAC offer in 2011 was for Colorado, Texas, Texas Tech, Texas A&M, Oklahoma, and Oklahoma State. The only Texas school left behind was Baylor. Texas would have had an 8 team division with 6 Big 12 schools and the Arizona twins - was Baylor worth that much to UT-Austin?

And even in 1992, there was wide suspicion that FSU picked the ACC because they knew it would be a lot easier for them to dominate than the SEC. That implies agency.

In Diplomacy, a territory can't pick where it goes. It has no agency. Munich can't decide that it wants to leave Germany and begin discussions with Austria-Hungary like Texas A&M, Miami, and UConn did.
07-10-2019 09:28 AM
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Just to be clear - I think the OP was brilliant. I'm just trying to add a comment that's more than blowing smoke up the OP's rear end.
07-10-2019 09:33 AM
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-07-2019 09:36 PM)RutgersMike Wrote:  Now, which conferences at the start would be England, France, Germany, Austria-Hungary, Italy, Russia and Turkey?

I got introduced to diplomacy the end of my freshman (or sophmore) year in high school - we played after the AP tests in history class. First time, I didn't really get the game and we played with partners, and my partner wasn't the greatest. But then we started playing on our own. Still proud of a solo victory as Germany!

Anyways:
That's a super hard question.

I feel like both the Big East and the PAC-12 have claims to being France.
Big East: Historically - we lost Alsace and Lorraine! (Pitt/Syracuse)
PAC 12- Board Game - We get Spain and no one cares. (Utah)

I'll give the Big East France because Pac-12 could be England and take say Sweden or Holland, etc. and still not many people care.

Historically speaking, we'd have to say that the Big 10 is Austria. The assassination is what started the whole thing, after all. Yes, the balance of power was already shaky, but announcing the intent to expand sent shockwaves.

I'd say that makes the Big 12 Germany. Not really responsible but pays the price.

Geographically, that makes the SEC Italy as it moves in on Germany, but I'd say the SEC is really Russia.

Turkey is a good fit for the ACC. Ninja Swofford swoops in and all of a sudden they get the Balkans.

Italy then would be everyone else left, or the G5 as a whole.
07-10-2019 12:30 PM
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Fighting Muskie Online
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
(07-10-2019 09:28 AM)Captain Bearcat Wrote:  
(07-09-2019 03:16 PM)JRsec Wrote:  
(07-09-2019 02:55 PM)Captain Bearcat Wrote:  
(07-08-2019 03:53 PM)JRsec Wrote:  Real Realignment is Diplomacy. An entertaining OP, but as an old line Diplomacy player there is no luck, just plotted moves, strategy, and a lot of back room talks with more or less implied NDA's and the comparing of notes.

That's exactly what goes on in Realignment. The only difference is that teams of attorneys handle most of it when it gets past the back door conversations, past the secret application, and the early note passing. Oh, just one more thing, there is always a network involved as well.

One big difference: in reallignment, the powerful schools have a choice in the matter. In Diplomacy, a territory is powerless about who takes it over.

Some schools are powerful enough to initiate a conference realignment all on their own, and the conferences fell in line. Miami in 2003. Texas A&M in 2011. UConn in 2019.

Other schools pick their conference despite a clearly superior opportunity elsewhere. Miami in 1992. Florida State in 1992. Texas in 2011 (when they decided to stay put).

What people forget is that in '92 the ACC made slightly more than the SEC and Bowden had been put off by the SEC on multiple occasions in the 80's. So I wouldn't say given the circumstances at the time that the SEC was "clearly" the superior choice. Now considering how little extra TV revenue the ACC has made in comparison to the SEC since '92 in retrospect it would have been the clearly superior move, but in '92 it was different.

Texas stayed in 2011 because they couldn't take the right schools with them and they may have been having some buyers remorse prior to inking the deal since they are so very used to calling the shots.

Perhaps.

But the original PAC offer in 2011 was for Colorado, Texas, Texas Tech, Texas A&M, Oklahoma, and Oklahoma State. The only Texas school left behind was Baylor. Texas would have had an 8 team division with 6 Big 12 schools and the Arizona twins - was Baylor worth that much to UT-Austin?

And even in 1992, there was wide suspicion that FSU picked the ACC because they knew it would be a lot easier for them to dominate than the SEC. That implies agency.

In Diplomacy, a territory can't pick where it goes. It has no agency. Munich can't decide that it wants to leave Germany and begin discussions with Austria-Hungary like Texas A&M, Miami, and UConn did.

Realignment Diplomacy is a bit nuanced. Rather than one unified power it's more like a team captain (commissioner) who has no real say and then 8-14 group members who each have their interests. Some of them work for the good of the whole; others are selfish and want what's best for them and are willing to sabotage and abandon their teammates if it means joining a better team.
07-10-2019 08:21 PM
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Fighting Muskie Online
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RE: If realignment was the game Diplomacy
Time for an update to our Realignment Diplomacy game:

After several turns of no one doing anything a flu bug went around the neighborhood. The Big 10 and PAC 12 figured the game would just stop but the SEC, ACC, and Big 12 said suck it up you sissies and the game went on. After the flu thing started to clear up everyone started worrying about having enough money for pizza.

The SEC made the move no one saw coming—they went for the jugular and took the Big 12’s two most prized territories, Texas and Oklahoma, but ignored the rest, thinking it best to make them linger on.

The rest of of the Big 12 pleaded for the PAC 12 to come in for the mercy kill, but they refused and decided to settle for grabbing some of the Big East’s old sharpie drawn territories and even drew one of their own in the middle of Utah. The PAC 12 thought this new territory was a bit too “churchy” for their liking, and declared they didn’t recognize this enclave in their footprint. The Big 12 also decided that Houston was a legit territory and called it theirs.

A turn later, the Big 10 decided to convoy an army out of the Potomac via their fleet in Maryland and invaded the PAC 12 territories of USC and UCLA. No body else really saw it coming or even thought this move was possible but apparently they were using some Axis & Allies rules or something. (Suddenly that Rutgers/Maryland move makes sense as the launching point for the invasion of LA.) The ACC starts doing some head math to see if they can put a fleet in Puget Sound before they themselves get wiped out.

No one was more bewildered by this move than the PAC 12 who had been in an Alliance with the Big 10 since turn 1 and thought their pan-Big 10/ACC/PAC 12 alliance was going to keep the SEC at bay permanently. This sent them into a schizophrenic melt down and they began pleading with the Big 10 and Big 12 to finish them off.

With no path to victory, the PAC 12, Big 12, and ACC all start strategize how to play for 3rd place and outlast the other two. meanwhile the SEC and Big 10 are thumbing through the rules trying to find out if the game can end with a two-way draw.
(This post was last modified: 07-28-2022 04:38 PM by Fighting Muskie.)
07-28-2022 03:33 PM
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