and Joe Lee dumb*** is the DC at Memphis again (I'm pretty sure) this year...He's gonna come after Eli...Vandy hit him all day long...

I told yall exactly what would happen in this game (and told yall to lay 5K on it too!)...I hope some of you followed my advice!

So much for getting Spurlock some playing time.

Coach Peanut Wrote:and Joe Lee dumb*** is the DC at Memphis again (I'm pretty sure) this year...He's gonna come after Eli...Vandy hit him all day long...

I told yall exactly what would happen in this game (and told yall to lay 5K on it too!)...I hope some of you followed my advice!

So much for getting Spurlock some playing time.

You're right about JLD being DC and Memphis again. For a much improved and much bigger offensive line, they've got work to do. As for Spurlock seeing playing time, we'll see plenty of him if they keep getting to Eli Coach.

This was a win, but a painful one.

WR

Oh, Coach Peanut, the Memphis D might come after Eli, but don't you think our O line will be "warriors?' Won't they "compete?" Eli might get knocked on his a$$ all day, but we'll be competitive!

I repeat: tar and feathers time. This was a win but it was ugly, and if it's any indication of things to come, it's going to be even uglier. Perhaps it's a blessing in disguise. The powers that be will be forced to get rid of this cretin, Buttsniffe.

By the way, Coach Peanut, I wish I had followed your advice and put a significant sum on Vandy, because I felt in my bones there was no way in hell we were going to beat that spread... Not that I would do anything illegal, of course. :girl:

If we don't make huge improvements next week (like by Monday, as LR said), there is a very good chance we will get ourselves beat. Joe Lee is a good coach, and while it may be that ever'body knows what Joe Lee does, he can put together tough, inspired defenses. Klutzcliffe would not know about that kind of thing. He is still listening to Perry Como.

I'll bet Butts has got Perry on the hi-fi now. Butts is in his smoking jacket and slippers, having a cup of warm milk (no hot chocolate-- caffeine keeps him up past 9:00) and listening to "It's Impossible."

Speaking of which, why don't we come up with a spoof of that song. Shouldn't be too hard. Here are the original lyrics:



Artist: Perry Como

Buy Perry Como's CD

It's Impossible

Artist: Perry Como (peak Billboard position # 10 in 1970)
English words by Sid Wayne and Music by Armando Manzanero

It's impossible, tell the sun to leave the sky, it's just impossible
It's impossible, ask a baby not to cry, it's just impossible
Can I hold you closer to me and not feel you goin' through me
But the second that I never think of you, oh how impossible

Can the ocean keep from rushin' to the shore, it's just impossible
If I had you, could I ever want for more, it's just impossible
And tomorrow, shouldya ask me for the world, somehow I'd get it
I would sell my very soul and not regret it
For to live without your love is just impossible

Repeat second verse

Impossible, immmmmm-impossible

Transcribed by Ronald E. Hontz
ronhontz@worldnet.att.net

Dorothy Parker Wrote:I'll bet Butts has got Perry on the hi-fi now. Butts is in his smoking jacket and slippers, having a cup of warm milk (no hot chocolate-- caffeine keeps him up past 9:00) and listening to "It's Impossible."

Speaking of which, why don't we come up with a spoof of that song. Shouldn't be too hard. Here are the original lyrics:



Artist: Perry Como

Buy Perry Como's CD

It's Impossible

Artist: Perry Como (peak Billboard position # 10 in 1970)
English words by Sid Wayne and Music by Armando Manzanero

It's impossible, tell the sun to leave the sky, it's just impossible
It's impossible, ask a baby not to cry, it's just impossible
Can I hold you closer to me and not feel you goin' through me
But the second that I never think of you, oh how impossible

Can the ocean keep from rushin' to the shore, it's just impossible
If I had you, could I ever want for more, it's just impossible
And tomorrow, shouldya ask me for the world, somehow I'd get it
I would sell my very soul and not regret it
For to live without your love is just impossible

Repeat second verse

Impossible, immmmmm-impossible

Transcribed by Ronald E. Hontz
ronhontz@worldnet.att.net

ROTFLMAO

With a few key changes, don't you think it could be Butts's theme song?


It's impossible... Tell the D to stop the run, it's just impossible...

I think it is definitely his theme song. We should play it before every Ole Miss game

That's a lovely photo of Mars. Sort of puts everything in perspective... for ten or fifteen seconds, anyway. Now, back to my tar-boiling.

As the once formerly esteemed Sheriff of Fantasy Island (ahem), I'd just like to say, DP. . .

. . .that was funny as HAYULL! ::laughing my arse off::

"It's impossible. . ." I love it. Clappy's new theme song.

Hello, Mr. Borden. I'm glad you like the idea for the theme song. Allow me to introduce myself. You may call me Dorothy, if you like.
Please do try to think of some alternative lyrics for song. By so doing you will give it its only redeeming social value!
:girl:

Dorothy Parker Wrote:It's Impossible

Artist: Perry Como (peak Billboard position # 10 in 1970)
English words by Sid Wayne and Music by Armando Manzanero

It's impossible, tell the sun to leave the sky, it's just impossible
It's impossible, ask a baby not to cry, it's just impossible
Can I hold you closer to me and not feel you goin' through me
But the second that I never think of you, oh how impossible

Can the ocean keep from rushin' to the shore, it's just impossible
If I had you, could I ever want for more, it's just impossible
And tomorrow, shouldya ask me for the world, somehow I'd get it
I would sell my very soul and not regret it
For to live without your love is just impossible

Yes, Dorothy, nice to make your acquaintance. You sure know a lot about football for a radical feminist girl, ma'am, begging your pardon. :)

And you can call me JBR, AKA President of the "I love big hairy men club."

Let's see here. I used to be able to do this. . .

It's impossible, tell Archie's son to leave for pie, it's just impossible
It's impossible, I'm a baby 'cause I cry, it's just impossible
Can I call another loser to me and feel them not goin' through the line
But the second that I ever think of a W, oh how impossible

Can Jamal's ACL keep from rushin' to the shore, it's just impossible
If I had another blue-chip, I'd still ever want for more, it's just impossible
And next season, shouldya ask me for the Ring, somehow I'd get it
If I had a soul I would sell it and not regret it
For to live without mediocrity is just impossible

thank you thank you! i'll be here all week!
:wave:

Oh, my dear JBR, where on earth did you get the idea that I was a radical feminist? I am hurt. And I happen to like big hairy men. (LOL) Please, please, don't ever call me a feminist again, and please do hold the door open for me if I ever meet you in person. (My nine-year-old son orders for me in restaurants, okay?) I'm not helpless, mind you, and I do believe in female suffrage, and I can and do support myself financially, but I am not a feminist, much less a radical one. Just ask my longtime friend Wry if you don't believe me.

Those lyrics are great! I knew you could do it!


Sincerely yours,

Dorothy

Okay, well, you might not be such a radical but I think your namesake was, right? At least, according to my not-so-radical-ex-wife, D. Parker was pretty non-status quo. Never read any of her stuff firsthand, so I'm really talking out of my arse. :eek:

Not that I ever do that. . .

Anyhoo, if you know Wry in RL then I'm sure we'll get along. He's one of my favorite posters on the board, about as fair and sober-minded as they come (when he's not just cussing Davey like a red-headed step-child).

As for the big hairy men, that's one of pea>NUTS' ideas about yours truly. He has this fifth grade notion that anybody who doesn't agree with 100% of what he has to say must be homosexual. I mean, I like a finger during oral sex as much as anybody, but that don't make me gay, right?

Hey, JBR-- FYI, there are equity feminists, and then there are gender feminists, more appropriately called feminazis or feministas. I think my namesake was the former, a feminist in the sense of equal-pay-for-equal work, but she was all woman, so to speak, and she did like men, unlike the man-bashing feminazis infesting the planet today, picketing Hooters and complaining about girlie magazines... I am sick to death of them; sorry I overreacted when I thought you were calling me one!

:girl:

For what it's worth, I don't think enjoying that little... extraneous activity makes you gay. Along those lines, my nine-going-on-30-old-son was complaining at brunch today that his guy friends were kidding him about being romantically involved with one of his best friends, who happens to be a girl. He concluded, "I'm going to tell those guys that if being friends with Lily makes me her boyfriend, then their being friends with each other makes them homosexual."

Dorothy Parker Wrote:Along those lines, my nine-going-on-30-old-son was complaining at brunch today that his guy friends were kidding him about being romantically involved with one of his best friends, who happens to be a girl. He concluded, "I'm going to tell those guys that if being friends with Lily makes me her boyfriend, then their being friends with each other makes them homosexual."

That's one of the best comebacks I've heard lately DP!!!

I'm glad that amused you, NPR. That kid keeps me in stitches. By the way, did you catch the Cutcliffe show? I turned the TV on just in time to see the closing credits. I was dying to hear what he had to say for himself.

An Ole Miss player was quoted in the Clarion-Ledger, something to the effect of, "We stayed humble throughout the game..." It's easy to be humble when you suck! :john:

I didn't get real excited about this season - well, I was very excited about the start of the College Football Season, but after watching the game Saturday, I'm hoping we win 3 or 4 more...I certainly don't expect any more. :eek: :frown: :eek: :frown:

The only chance we have of just duplicating last year is "IF" most of our opponents lose half their teams to injury and the flu the week we play them.

1: Pitiful "arm tackling".
2. NO RUSHING GAME!
3. "Cutcliffe has been stuffed and proped up on the sideline to give the illusion that he is "alive".
4. NO RUSH/PRESSURE on the opponents Q-back.
5. We are at least 5 yards off of every receiver for the other team when they catch a pass - our's are usually smacked square in the mouth as soon as they touch the ball.
6. We couldn't cover a good tight end from another team with a Ringling Bros. Barnum and Bailey Circus tent.
7. We have less enthusiasm than someone facing death by lethal injection.

(I know that we have had only one game but I honestly thought since Eli was staying for his Senior year, etc. etc. we would have a little spunk. I thought our "D" would be improved. I thought we might have a running game with the "EXPERIENCED" offensive line.) I THOUGHT WRONG. We will "possibly" win a few more games but once we get though those, hold on to your jock because we will be slaughted by our SEC opponents.

Somebody pinch me I wake me up...hopefully I just dreamed that we barely beat Vandy - that we looked like a mediocre Division II team. Maybe Cutcliffe was just playing opposum and we "didn't" want to show our hand. Great job if that is the case.

Thank God for Espy and Jonathan Nichols' leg. They were our highlights. (About 3:00p.m. yesterday, I was spotted paddling away from the "island" in an inner-tube!)

I didn't get real excited about this season - well, I was very excited about the start of the College Football Season, but after watching the game Saturday, I'm hoping we win 3 or 4 more...I certainly don't expect any more. :eek: :frown: :eek: :frown:

The only chance we have of just duplicating last year is "IF" most of our opponents lose half their teams to injury and the flu the week we play them.

1: Pitiful "arm tackling".
2. NO RUSHING GAME!
3. "Cutcliffe has been stuffed and proped up on the sideline to give the illusion that he is "alive".
4. NO RUSH/PRESSURE on the opponents Q-back.
5. We are at least 5 yards off of every receiver for the other team when they catch a pass - our's are usually smacked square in the mouth as soon as they touch the ball.
6. We couldn't cover a good tight end from another team with a Ringling Bros. Barnum and Bailey Circus tent.
7. We have less enthusiasm than someone facing death by lethal injection.

(I know that we have had only one game but I honestly thought since Eli was staying for his Senior year, etc. etc. we would have a little spunk. I thought our "D" would be improved. I thought we might have a running game with the "EXPERIENCED" offensive line.) I THOUGHT WRONG. We will "possibly" win a few more games but once we get though those, hold on to your jock because we will be slaughted by our SEC opponents.

Somebody pinch me I wake me up...hopefully I just dreamed that we barely beat Vandy - that we looked like a mediocre Division II team. Maybe Cutcliffe was just playing opposum and we "didn't" want to show our hand. Great job if that is the case.

Thank God for Espy and Jonathan Nichols' leg. They were our highlights. (About 3:00p.m. yesterday, I was spotted paddling away from the "island" in an inner-tube!)