LOL! I was busted so hard tonight on something that I needed to share. I wrote something on here last week - and have been telling a story for years - that turns out is totally wrong and completely embarrassing.

Mea culpa.

I think I'm an accidental racist - or at least that's what I was accused of being by my wife and some of our family/friends.

So, when I was in college, I used to go to see my now wife at her school, Penn State. Also, many of my friends from HS went to Penn State so I would visit them a few times per year as well. We always had a good time.

One of the guys who used to hang with us also hung out with some girls on the Penn State women's hoops team and a few times we hung with them too.

One of the girls was named Jessica Strom - she was Penn State's PG and she was a nice girl. She had a bunch of soccer playing brothers that I knew through different avenues and we got along well. The other girl - who for years I had identified as Swin Cash - was actually named Tanisha Wright.

How embarrassing!

For a LONG time now I have been recounting this story and each time I called this poor girl Swin Cash. Unfortunately, as was pointed out to me tonight, the only things they have in common is the each excel at women's hoops, they are each from Pittsburgh and they are both black. Wright went to Penn State but Cash, as I learned tonight, went to Connecticut.

LOL! They look absolutely nothing alike.

I have no idea how I got that screwed up but I did. And for years I have been calling that poor girl "Swin." I think I may have even called her "Swin" on the nights (plural) we were hanging out with those girls. She probably thought I was messing with her (I love to tease people) or that I was crazy but I in reality I was just stupid.

I am so embarrassed (but also a little amused).

Flash forward to tonight: Every Easter we have over a ton of friends and family to celebrate and tonight we had some old friends drop in that I hadn't really hung out with in years. One of them was my friend Brian, about whom this whole story centers on.

Anyway, at some point we started talking about basketball and Connecticut's sweep of the championship. Naturally somebody volunteered that they love women's basketball because of its solid fundamentals and I went off on them just as I did online a few weeks back.

Then, thinking I was about to prove my point, I bring in my star witness, Brian to drive everything home. Brian was a solid HS basketball player but nothing more. However, he could make friends with the Grim Reaper if he had to and always had a lot of friends. Brian once told me that he would kill his friend "Swin" when they played one-on-one.

Anyway, I call him into the room I was in and say, "Brian, I was just talking about this the other day but didn't you used to pound Swin Cash?"

He looked at me like I had seven heads and said, "WTF are you talking about?"

Then everyone around the table started dying from laughter. Then he offered, completely missing my point, "I've never even met Swin Cash, much less had sex with her." He then looked at my mom and assured her that he's not that kind of guy. She didn't buy a word of it because she's known him long enough to know that he is EXACTLY that type of guy.

I told him that wasn't what I meant. I meant that he use to kill her in basketball.

That's when he hit me with, "Seriously dude, what are you talking about?"

By this point everyone is just completely in stitches and totally confused...including me.

Then I recounted the story to him from college and he then starts belly laughing and says simply, "Oh Dear Lord, you really are an idiot."

That was not a revelation to me or anyone who knows me. I am definitely a complete idiot.

After several more minutes of playing "Who's on First", we untangle the whole mystery and I learn that this idiot used to make fun of his friend Tanisha by calling her "Swin" - as in she was a Swin Cash wannabe. He had long forgotten about that little joke he had with her until tonight.

He obviously jokingly called her "Swin" in front of me the one night and I just assumed that was her name so I stuck with it - for about a decade now. And how many basketball playing Swins could there be so I just assumed - ridiculously as it turns out - that it was Swin Cash. How embarrassing!

Also, as I learned tonight, Swin cash is gorgeous whereas Tanisha is...uh, a good basketball player.

Oh, and he also told me that he never once played her in basketball. That was just a joke they had and that Tanisha would have killed him if they had played one-on-one. I obviously bought hook, line and sinker as well. I now have no clue what is going on so I will shut up and take my medicine on this one.

I'm not normally that gullible, or at least I don't think I am. Maybe this was the only one I've been clued in on? At any rate, I just thought it would be good for a laugh for everyone at my expense.

I'll hang my head in shame for now.

Oh, and Happy Easter!

(04-20-2014 10:26 PM)Dr. Isaly von Yinzer Wrote:  ...Swin cash is gorgeous whereas Tanisha is...uh, a good basketball player.

Please don't hold back - tell us how you REALLY feel!

Oh my.