Now we know... Decoding Cal Speak. Reply

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"I'll take talent over experience" = "If we run into experienced talent, we'll get our asses kicked"

"He's a scorer" = "He can't shoot and he's too short to play a forward position - all he can do is dribble into traffic"

"He's athletic" = "Not only can he not shoot, he also can't play defense"

"He's long" = "He waves as the opponent dribbles past him"

"Help these kids achieve their dreams" = "Hey, I'm just playing the lottery here - if I recruit a bunch of wanna be NBAers, eventually I'll find an acorn in the pig slop - if I'm lucky I'll find two"

"I like my team" = "I'll like them a lot more when they're on somebody else's team."

"I'm not concerned about free throws" = "Every coach in America knows I can't teach kids how to shoot free throws"

"Our length makes us a good zone team" = "They can't guard their own shadows, this is my only chance"

"They need to play for each other" = "Boy, I wish the NBA drafted right out of high school!"

"The SEC needs six teams in the tournament!" = "Damn, we are stinking up the joint and will probably end up facing a #1 seed in the second round."

"I only plan to Coach for 10 years" = "How much longer can I milk that title win? Tubby used it for 10"

"I'm against one and done!" = No, really! Do you see these head cases I have to coach? Try doing that every stinking year! NOW, I'm stuck with it! Every head case wants to come to Kentucky. I do my best to run them off and they still want to come here! I'm going to end up losing my mind and living in a van down by the river! I'm going crazy! I'm losing it!"

"You people are crazy!" = "Like stalker crazy! Get a life! It's just basketball! It's not world peace! What do you want me to do - sign a number 1 recruiting class every year and then keep them around for four years? Wait, of course you do! That's exactly what you want! You're nuts! You're whacky! You're lunatics! Just settle down and remember two words

that is some funny shite right there

"The SEC needs six teams in the tournament!"

that's probably the funniest of all the quotes.