Pedal, mutherphfuckas, pedal! Some kick@ss crashes! More stage awards so we can see the French hotties!

Who the phfuck designed those Jiffy Lube jumpsuits for the award girls?! And what's with the Happy Meal girls they've been putting up there? Hogsleds!

Hey, Lance. Time to use some of those drugs that Landis, has been accusing you of using! Dope it up, dude!

Perhaps matching "yellow" thongs & pasties would improve the view on the award podiums. Just on the girls, thank you.

Okay, Lance, the drugs are starting to kick-in! Moved up from 18th to 14th! Try some Amsterdam Gold ("The Whopper") tonight, and you'll be ready for a kick-@ss ride tomorrow!

Drugs, Lance, drugs!!!

Today is a day of rest. Translation: getting "baked" in the trailer!

Uh, oh, Lancey Pants. Federal authorities investigating possible fraud and doping charges against you and associates, have issued grand jury subpoenas to witnesses.

Now we have head-butting in the races? What's next, people throwing golf clubs into the spokes?!

MLN, where the phfuck have you been? Thank you for bringing credibility back to the Tour de @ss! I have gotten so tired of looking at those mudslide @sses during the first 12-stages! I knew the REAL French hotties were out there, it just took your photo "expertise" to bring them into focus.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Oh, I just noticed those are the 2009 hotties (background banner). You don't have any 2010 hotties? Because all I've seen so far are Wisconsin Cheese Farm girls!

Okay, a little bit better "talent" on the podium today. Hopefully, as we get closer to Paris, the "talent" will be progressively enhanced.

It looks like a lot of the chicks this year are the same as last year.

They're just starting to bring out the "oldies but goodies." I don't know where they found the troglodytes they had on the podiums through the first 12-13 stages. Today, the ones in the black dresses and umbrella skirts were HOT!!! Note to self: get an umbrella stand!

You know, every time I see those "Jiffy Lube Jumpsuits," I want to say,
who gave you permission to inject botox into your thighs, knees, and @ss?! The designer should be deported!

What exactly are they "measuring" when their hands are in the open clap position?

Hawks, never use "measuring" and "clap" in the same sentence.

Here's your explanation, Hawks!

(07-18-2010 05:38 AM)MyLeftNut Wrote:  It looks like a lot of the chicks this year are the same as last year.

- Likes tongue only.

- Midget (D)ick.

- The whole enchilada!

- Double penetration.

- Doggie style.

Well, that explains it!