08-03-2006, 02:04 PM
=>First my buddy Shane from Law School scheduled his wedding the date of the originally scheduled NIU game. This is the same jackhole who scheduled the wedding of his first marriage on the date of the Miami-Marshall game in 1997 (the one where Miami beat a Herdiban team lead by Randy Moss and Chad Pennington). I missed that game and as a result, I only saw Miami beat Marshall once. Such a sacrifice on my part to go to his wedding on THAT date only to see him get a divorce within two years. Effin' jackhole.
Luckily for me, Miami moved the NIU game to Sunday night.
I thought I was actually going to have a football season with no wedding conflicts. I was wrong.
I just received a wedding invitation from my dumbsh!t first cousin scheduled to begin at 2pm on Saturday, September 16, 2006. Miami hosts Kent at 2pm on that day. Cousin Joey should be ashamed of himself. My own flesh and blood.
Every effin' year it is the same sh!t. There is always 1 or 2 fall weddings I have to go to. Never do I get an invite for a late April or May or July wedding. June sometimes. Total bullsh!t. I have had it. At least last year the only game I missed was @ Temple. I was able to listen to a little bit of the 2nd half in the car on the way to the reception hall. I brought a radio with me with an earpiece to listen during the reception, but the music was too loud. Plus, family members kept wanting to talk to me about this and that (plus my wife kept b!tching about how rude I was for listening to the game instead of socializing -- I blew her off of course ).
It is the b!tches we men marry who do this. It is their first attempt to control male behavior by getting married at a time when heterosexual males would rather be doing something else. These women conspire to have as big as weddings as possible to make sure as many men are taken away from the college football they love so much.
I have never been to a fall wedding where I did not hear at least one conversation among men complaining about some game they are missing. If there is a bar with a T.V. at the reception, 1/2 the men crowd it to watch a game.
Fall and winter weddings are just rude. Weddings should take place btw the 2nd weekend in April through the 2nd weekend in August.
I proposed on Valentine's day in Oxford minutes before a Miami-NIU basketball game. After she said "yes" near the Upham Arches, I then said, "Good, let's go, we are running late for the game." We got married 16 months later in June of the next year. My wife wanted to get married in the previous November or October. I was man enough to say no and explain to her how rude it is to heterosexual males to have a wedding on a college football Saturday.
TO ANYBODY WHO IS OR MAY CONSIDER A FALL OR WINTER WEDDING: Don't do it. It is wrong. Your marriage will be cursed as fall weddings are an afront to God and the Woofing Gods. See what happened to Shane's first marriage as discussed above.
For those that have scheduled a full or winter wedding to take place in the next few months, it is NOT TOO late to change it. If your future spouse truly loves you, he/she will understand. Men who were obligated to attend your fall/winter wedding will respect you and appreciate your courtesy.
For those of you who have had a fall/winter wedding in the past, MAY GOD HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL YOU POOR SICK SPINELESS BASTARD!!! Maybe someday your wife will take your balls out of her safe and let you wear them to 5 seconds.
http://www.thephatphree.com/features.asp...ctionID=11
Luckily for me, Miami moved the NIU game to Sunday night.
I thought I was actually going to have a football season with no wedding conflicts. I was wrong.
I just received a wedding invitation from my dumbsh!t first cousin scheduled to begin at 2pm on Saturday, September 16, 2006. Miami hosts Kent at 2pm on that day. Cousin Joey should be ashamed of himself. My own flesh and blood.
Every effin' year it is the same sh!t. There is always 1 or 2 fall weddings I have to go to. Never do I get an invite for a late April or May or July wedding. June sometimes. Total bullsh!t. I have had it. At least last year the only game I missed was @ Temple. I was able to listen to a little bit of the 2nd half in the car on the way to the reception hall. I brought a radio with me with an earpiece to listen during the reception, but the music was too loud. Plus, family members kept wanting to talk to me about this and that (plus my wife kept b!tching about how rude I was for listening to the game instead of socializing -- I blew her off of course ).
It is the b!tches we men marry who do this. It is their first attempt to control male behavior by getting married at a time when heterosexual males would rather be doing something else. These women conspire to have as big as weddings as possible to make sure as many men are taken away from the college football they love so much.
I have never been to a fall wedding where I did not hear at least one conversation among men complaining about some game they are missing. If there is a bar with a T.V. at the reception, 1/2 the men crowd it to watch a game.
Fall and winter weddings are just rude. Weddings should take place btw the 2nd weekend in April through the 2nd weekend in August.
I proposed on Valentine's day in Oxford minutes before a Miami-NIU basketball game. After she said "yes" near the Upham Arches, I then said, "Good, let's go, we are running late for the game." We got married 16 months later in June of the next year. My wife wanted to get married in the previous November or October. I was man enough to say no and explain to her how rude it is to heterosexual males to have a wedding on a college football Saturday.
TO ANYBODY WHO IS OR MAY CONSIDER A FALL OR WINTER WEDDING: Don't do it. It is wrong. Your marriage will be cursed as fall weddings are an afront to God and the Woofing Gods. See what happened to Shane's first marriage as discussed above.
For those that have scheduled a full or winter wedding to take place in the next few months, it is NOT TOO late to change it. If your future spouse truly loves you, he/she will understand. Men who were obligated to attend your fall/winter wedding will respect you and appreciate your courtesy.
For those of you who have had a fall/winter wedding in the past, MAY GOD HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL YOU POOR SICK SPINELESS BASTARD!!! Maybe someday your wife will take your balls out of her safe and let you wear them to 5 seconds.
http://www.thephatphree.com/features.asp...ctionID=11